I have thought about this post for weeks. I was not sure if I was going to write it in the end, but alas! here we are.
It was around this time that I finally opened up about an incredibly traumatic event that I had gone through years ago (if you have no idea what I am talking about click here)
I still remember how much I was shaking when I pressed tweet on twitter and watched as my mentions erupted. Most of the comments were sympathetic, which was nice. you also had the usual set of weirdos who could not help but make their jokes.
It is twitter so I paid them no mind because for some of these people twitter is the only source that makes them feel important in their otherwise meaningless lives.
There were some people who assumed that I had finally spoken out about this situation for pity. This could not be furthest from the truth. For me, it was part of my journey of healing. Often we as human beings claim that we are over something when in actual fact we aren’t. We have just learnt to compartmentalise in order to survive this chaotic thing called life.
Since that day, I have felt a weight lift off my shoulders. A weight I had no idea I was carrying. No longer did I worry about engaging with the wrong tweet and someone bringing up my past. I did not tweet in fear anymore.
Tweet in fear? Yep. I do not like conflict. I do not like the spotlight on my head unless for good reason. So knowing that there were still people on the TL who knew about what had happened, I was always on edge that one day I might say something someone may not agree with, and then just like that they will bring it back up again.
I definitely do not regret writing that post that day. I highly recommend to anyone who has been a traumatic situation, write about it, talk about it out loud. Free yourself from the burden and I PROMISE you won’t regret it.